[apps-discuss] apps-team review of draft-das-mipshop-andsf-dhcp-options
Claudio Allocchio <Claudio.Allocchio@garr.it> Mon, 06 September 2010 14:59 UTC
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Date: Mon, 06 Sep 2010 16:40:47 +0200
From: Claudio Allocchio <Claudio.Allocchio@garr.it>
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Subject: [apps-discuss] apps-team review of draft-das-mipshop-andsf-dhcp-options
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I have been selected as the Applications Area Review Team reviewer for this draft (for background on apps-review, please see http://www.apps.ietf.org/content/applications-area-review-team). Please resolve these comments along with any other Last Call comments you may receive. Please wait for direction from your document shepherd or AD before posting a new version of the draft. Document: draft-das-mipshop-andsf-dhcp-options Reviewer: Claudio Allocchio (GARR, Italian Research and Academic Network) Review Date: 2010-09-06 IETF Last Call Date: 2010-08-09 (?) IESG Telechat Date: 2010-09-09 Summary: This draft has not any specific Application Area issues (use of XML, date/time format, URIs, Internationalization conformance, IDNA, etc.), hence fro this point of view it is ready for publication as Proposed Standard. Major Issues: None. Minor Issues: - section 2: maybe I'm just overconcerned with clarity, but I would rephrase the second senctence and schema repeating "IPv4 address" instead of only "IP address(es)" The Option begins with an option code followed by a length and one or more IPv4 addresses. The option layout is depicted below: 0 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 0 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 0 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 0 1 +-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+ | Option Code | Length | +-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+ | IPv4 Address | . . +-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+ - Section 3: same as above: use "IPv6 address(es)" all the time, instead of only "IP address(es)". Nits: None. I hope this helps! ;-) Best Regards! Claudio ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Claudio Allocchio G A R R Claudio.Allocchio@garr.it Senior Technical Officer tel: +39 040 3758523 Italian Academic and G=Claudio; S=Allocchio; fax: +39 040 3758565 Research Network P=garr; A=garr; C=it; PGP Key: http://www.cert.garr.it/PGP/keys.php3#ca
- [apps-discuss] apps-team review of draft-das-mips… Claudio Allocchio