[Gen-art] review of draft-ietf-roll-terminology-13.txt
Francis Dupont <Francis.Dupont@fdupont.fr> Mon, 21 October 2013 13:59 UTC
Return-Path: <Francis.Dupont@fdupont.fr>
X-Original-To: gen-art@ietfa.amsl.com
Delivered-To: gen-art@ietfa.amsl.com
Received: from localhost (localhost [127.0.0.1]) by ietfa.amsl.com (Postfix) with ESMTP id DF23F11E8520 for <gen-art@ietfa.amsl.com>; Mon, 21 Oct 2013 06:59:51 -0700 (PDT)
X-Virus-Scanned: amavisd-new at amsl.com
X-Spam-Flag: NO
X-Spam-Score: -2.134
X-Spam-Level:
X-Spam-Status: No, score=-2.134 tagged_above=-999 required=5 tests=[AWL=0.465, BAYES_00=-2.599]
Received: from mail.ietf.org ([12.22.58.30]) by localhost (ietfa.amsl.com [127.0.0.1]) (amavisd-new, port 10024) with ESMTP id PrYmQXvKIHtz for <gen-art@ietfa.amsl.com>; Mon, 21 Oct 2013 06:59:50 -0700 (PDT)
Received: from givry.fdupont.fr (givry.fdupont.fr [IPv6:2001:41d0:1:6d55:211:5bff:fe98:d51e]) by ietfa.amsl.com (Postfix) with ESMTP id F1FD711E8544 for <gen-art@ietf.org>; Mon, 21 Oct 2013 06:57:36 -0700 (PDT)
Received: from givry.fdupont.fr (localhost [127.0.0.1]) by givry.fdupont.fr (8.14.3/8.14.3) with ESMTP id r9LDvJa5007562; Mon, 21 Oct 2013 15:57:19 +0200 (CEST) (envelope-from dupont@givry.fdupont.fr)
Message-Id: <201310211357.r9LDvJa5007562@givry.fdupont.fr>
From: Francis Dupont <Francis.Dupont@fdupont.fr>
To: gen-art@ietf.org
Date: Mon, 21 Oct 2013 15:57:19 +0200
Sender: Francis.Dupont@fdupont.fr
Cc: draft-ietf-roll-terminology.all@tools.ietf.org
Subject: [Gen-art] review of draft-ietf-roll-terminology-13.txt
X-BeenThere: gen-art@ietf.org
X-Mailman-Version: 2.1.12
Precedence: list
List-Id: "GEN-ART: General Area Review Team" <gen-art.ietf.org>
List-Unsubscribe: <https://www.ietf.org/mailman/options/gen-art>, <mailto:gen-art-request@ietf.org?subject=unsubscribe>
List-Archive: <http://www.ietf.org/mail-archive/web/gen-art>
List-Post: <mailto:gen-art@ietf.org>
List-Help: <mailto:gen-art-request@ietf.org?subject=help>
List-Subscribe: <https://www.ietf.org/mailman/listinfo/gen-art>, <mailto:gen-art-request@ietf.org?subject=subscribe>
X-List-Received-Date: Mon, 21 Oct 2013 13:59:52 -0000
I am the assigned Gen-ART reviewer for this draft. For background on Gen-ART, please see the FAQ at <http://wiki.tools.ietf.org/area/gen/trac/wiki/GenArtfaq>. Please resolve these comments along with any other Last Call comments you may receive. Document: draft-ietf-roll-terminology-13.txt Reviewer: Francis Dupont Review Date: 20131014 IETF LC End Date: 20131027 IESG Telechat date: 20131024 Summary: Ready Major issues: None Minor issues: None Nits/editorial comments: (BTW only editorial comments) - Title page 1: Ruting -> Routing - Abstract page 1: e.g. -> e.g., - ToC page 2 and 5 page 7: Acknowledgements -> Acknowledgments - 2 page 3: commisioning -> commissioning - 2 page 4 Data Sink: move the LBR into from Field Device to here - 2 page 4 and many pages 5 and 6: e.g. -> e.g., and i.e. -> i.e., - 2 page 4: I suggest to use real units, i.e., KiB (aka kibibyte) and kbits/s (K not followed by i stands for Kelvin :-) - 2 page 5 P2MP: RFC4461]and [RFC4875] -> RFC4461] and [RFC4875] - 2 page 6: arbitratry -> arbitrary Regards Francis.Dupont@fdupont.fr
- Re: [Gen-art] review of draft-ietf-roll-terminolo… Jari Arkko
- [Gen-art] review of draft-ietf-roll-terminology-1… Francis Dupont