[Gen-art] review of draft-ietf-mpls-ipv6-only-gap-03.txt

Francis Dupont <Francis.Dupont@fdupont.fr> Wed, 29 October 2014 13:56 UTC

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From: Francis Dupont <Francis.Dupont@fdupont.fr>
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Subject: [Gen-art] review of draft-ietf-mpls-ipv6-only-gap-03.txt
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I am the assigned Gen-ART reviewer for this draft. For background on
Gen-ART, please see the FAQ at

<http://wiki.tools.ietf.org/area/gen/trac/wiki/GenArtfaq>.

Please resolve these comments along with any other Last Call comments
you may receive.

Document: draft-ietf-mpls-ipv6-only-gap-03.txt
Reviewer: Francis Dupont
Review Date: 20141025
IETF LC End Date: 20141027
IESG Telechat date: unknown

Summary: Ready

Major issues: None

Minor issues: None

Nits/editorial comments:
 - ToC page 2 and 5 page 18: Acknowledgements -> Acknowledgments

 - 3.2.6 page 8: singaling -> signaling

 - 3.3.1 page 9: e.g. -> e.g.,

 - 3.3.2.4.1 pages 11 and 12: the conclusion (Gap: None) doesn't seem
  very in phase with the text. Perhaps it is another case of "out of scope
  known gap"?

 - 3.4.2 page 15 (UK vs US spelling): behaviour -> behavior

 - 4 page 17: Identifed -> Identified

 - 6 pages 18 and 19, Authors' Addresses page 26: I don't like
  ISO IS 3166 two letter codes used in postal addresses but it seems
  to be what the new RFC required...

Regards

Francis.Dupont@fdupont.fr

PS: I reviewed the 02 version but now the 03 was published so I updated
my comments. rfcdiff shows 03 is better than 02 at the exception of:
 - in 3.3.1.1 page 9 perhaps a missing '<' as I can see:
    ... (see xref    
    target="LDP"/>).
PPS: it could be useful to have a checklist of all RFCs which should
be updated but it is more a task for the WG than something to put
in the document (I don't follow the WG so I don't know if it already
exists :-).