[Gen-art] Gen-ART Last Call review of draft-ietf-kitten-cammac-04

Meral Shirazipour <meral.shirazipour@ericsson.com> Wed, 02 December 2015 23:40 UTC

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From: Meral Shirazipour <meral.shirazipour@ericsson.com>
To: "draft-ietf-kitten-cammac.all@tools.ietf.org" <draft-ietf-kitten-cammac.all@tools.ietf.org>, "gen-art@ietf.org" <gen-art@ietf.org>
Thread-Topic: Gen-ART Last Call review of draft-ietf-kitten-cammac-04
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Date: Wed, 02 Dec 2015 23:40:49 +0000
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Subject: [Gen-art] Gen-ART Last Call review of draft-ietf-kitten-cammac-04
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I am the assigned Gen-ART reviewer for this draft. The General Area Review Team (Gen-ART) reviews all IETF documents being processed by the IESG for the IETF Chair.  Please treat these comments just like any other last call comments.

For more information, please see the FAQ at <http://wiki.tools.ietf.org/area/gen/trac/wiki/GenArtfaq>.


Document: draft-ietf-kitten-cammac-04
Reviewer: Meral Shirazipour
Review Date: 2015-12-02
IETF LC End Date:  2015-12-04 (2nd LC)
IESG Telechat date: 2015-12-17


Summary:
This draft is ready to be published as Standards Track RFC but I have some comments/nits.

Major issues:

Minor issues:

Nits/editorial comments:
[Page 3] 2nd and 3rd paragraph: The word "service" is used to designate both the proxy-service and the second backend "application-service" as per [MS-SFU]. This may confuse the reader at first read.
Suggestion would be to use "proxy-service" and "application-service". [Page 8] after point "2." would also benefit from clearer use of these terms.

[Page 8], last paragraph, it was not clear to me if  "service principal" is the "application service"?

Best Regards,
Meral
---
Meral Shirazipour
Ericsson
Research
www.ericsson.com