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2 Network Working Group E. of
3 Internet-Draft The Internet
4 Intended status: Informational July 16, 2018
5 Expires: January 17, 2019
7 Social Media (An Apology)
8 draft-elders-social-media-apology-00
10 Abstract
12 Oops, we did it again.
14 Status of This Memo
16 This Internet-Draft is submitted in full conformance with the
17 provisions of BCP 78 and BCP 79.
19 Internet-Drafts are working documents of the Internet Engineering
20 Task Force (IETF). Note that other groups may also distribute
21 working documents as Internet-Drafts. The list of current Internet-
22 Drafts is at https://datatracker.ietf.org/drafts/current/.
24 Internet-Drafts are draft documents valid for a maximum of six months
25 and may be updated, replaced, or obsoleted by other documents at any
26 time. It is inappropriate to use Internet-Drafts as reference
27 material or to cite them other than as "work in progress."
29 This Internet-Draft will expire on January 17, 2019.
31 Copyright Notice
33 Copyright (c) 2018 IETF Trust and the persons identified as the
34 document authors. All rights reserved.
36 This document is subject to BCP 78 and the IETF Trust's Legal
37 Provisions Relating to IETF Documents
38 (https://trustee.ietf.org/license-info) in effect on the date of
39 publication of this document. Please review these documents
40 carefully, as they describe your rights and restrictions with respect
41 to this document. Code Components extracted from this document must
42 include Simplified BSD License text as described in Section 4.e of
43 the Trust Legal Provisions and are provided without warranty as
44 described in the Simplified BSD License.
46 1. Introduction
48 Recently, you may have noticed a dramatic increase in the amount of
49 opprobrium, outrage, hate speech and overall bile on your favorite
50 social media channel.
52 The Elders of the Internet apologize unreservedly for this
53 disruption.
55 Recently, our attention has been focused on keeping the United States
56 government, Comcast, your local ISP and some guy at the coffee shop
57 out of your bits [RFC7258].
59 As a result, we were caught unawares when the Internet became the
60 sink for every poorly-considered argument, paranoid thought when you
61 wake up in the dead of night, and shrieking nutjob you'd usually
62 cross the street to avoid.
64 Combined with the magnification offered by "likes" and "retweets",
65 along with the inevitable back-and-forth squabbling that ensures, the
66 Internet is currently having a crippling effect on your ability to
67 work, communicate productively, and - occasionally - breathe.
69 In retrospect, we should have known; USENET was a pretty clear
70 warning. We will do better.
72 2. Mitigations
74 To partially mitigate the effects of this phenomenon, a number of
75 techniques can be used. Note that none of these is a "fix", and some
76 undesirable effects (e.g., loss of sleep, appetite or democracy) may
77 persist.
79 2.1. Meme-Only Diet
81 Memes are a time-proven way to express disdain, mocking and other
82 sentiments while maintaining an air of light humor. They can
83 therefore be helpful in a transition away from full-throated, deeply-
84 felt outrage.
86 In other words, they're the methadone of the Internet. Memes are
87 only to be generated or consumed under advice of a doctor, as
88 prolonged use might result in undesirable side effects (e.g.,
89 [fourchan]).
91 2.2. Blocklists
93 Blocklists are a proven means of avoiding undesirable content, and
94 responsible social networks (looking at you, Facebook) implement
95 them. They may be able to help you enjoy the sparse benefits of a
96 social network without some of the worst side effects.
98 Recommending a specific blocklist is out of scope for this document,
99 but we suggest starting with "Trump" and working outwards from there.
101 2.3. Abstention
103 The most proven way to win is not to play. By abstaining from social
104 media, you may find you have more time, a more authentic and
105 meaningful engagement with life, and a corresponding lack of the
106 desire to stock up on canned food and ammunition.
108 Other benefits may include more productive and authentic
109 participation in genuine societal issues (as opposed to "using a
110 hashtag" while binge-watching [Netflix]).
112 2.4. Whisky
114 For those unable to leave social media or otherwise curtail their
115 use.
117 3. Security Considerations
119 The security of the Internet is the least of your problems. Buckle
120 up, kids.
122 4. Informative References
124 [fourchan]
125 Anonymous, "4Chan", n.d., .
127 [Netflix] Netflix, "Netflix", n.d., .
129 [RFC7258] Farrell, S. and H. Tschofenig, "Pervasive Monitoring Is an
130 Attack", BCP 188, RFC 7258, DOI 10.17487/RFC7258, May
131 2014, .
133 Appendix A. Membership Notes
135 The Edlers of the Internet note with sorrow the passing of our former
136 member, Stephen Hawking, aka "The Hawk." You will be missed.
138 Applications for membership are now being accepted at the usual IPv6
139 address.
141 Author's Address
143 Elders of the Internet
144 The Internet
146 Email: internet-elders@hotmail.com